i saw my face in a photograph
and i didn't know if i was ugly
or not and i was scared that the
world would never understand
that my heart was beautiful and
wanted to be touched and wanted
to be understood and wanted to
live even if the world didn't want
my body-had spit out my body-had
told me i was unworthy of continuing
and it didn't matter how many men wanted
to lick my breasts or how many women wished
they had my confidence all that mattered was
that i had seen that picture and i had found it
ugly and for the rest of my life when i looked
in a mirror all i would see was that picture,
and sometimes, i'd have to brush my teeth
with the light off.
